i have a lot of time for a lot of thoughts of late. (two things i am truly thankful for, truth be told.) these days, my focus lies heavily on course correction and breaking patterns. learning about attachment styles has not simply been eye-opening, it is also positively advantageous for my decision making. as a result, i have since been able to better identify what i should be steering well clear of—the individual with all of the rigid requirements for how we should interact, when, where. the other one who easily jumps to his own conclusions instead of raising it as a point of discussion to hear my side of things. the person who gets close one day and pulls all the way back the next. these patterns now become more pronounced than ever to me—it is as if i have finally seen the light and from hereon, can no longer un-see.

i cannot even begin to stress how important these things are to me now. at this stage of my life, i am never more aware that everything successful was deliberately formulated. that, as much as possible, whenever given the choice, i must align, adjust and angle things to favour me. i fully believe now that there is not much in this life that is actually accidental. perhaps there are some things dependent on time and timing, sure. but for the most part, it is making calculated commitments—being completely certain that the best choice is being made in the moment that you are making it. ergo, at this point looking forward, the primary, fundamental concern i have for all of my interpersonal relationships is whether or not it is one that is safe. nurturing. healthy. that is now my singular yardstick for a successful relationship regardless of its nature.