now, anyone who really knows me at all will know this: i am an absolute fan of social experiments and live for these sort of things. (i'm a huge Big Brother US fan and watch it religiously every year!) so when i'd first saw the trailer to Love Is Blind, the intrigue was instant.

completing all nine episodes as of (early) this morning and awaiting the finale happening thursday, here are my thoughts on the show.

first things first: the couples that i'm rooting for— it's a tie between cameron and lauren (the only interracial couple) and damian and gianina (the young couple). specifically, i love cameron from the former and gianina from the latter. however, i don't find lauren deserving of cameron. i think she's too much of a Doubting Debbie and my heart goes out to cameron whenever i watch his confessionals.

when it comes to damian and gianina, i love their pairing and think that damian is so good for gianina. even though i find gianina so lovable (on-screen), she is quite the firecracker and i think damian does so well to balance her crazy. maybe the drama speaks to me personally but i do really love their chemistry.

now, for the rest of the couples.

foremost, let me just get this out of the way: i utterly despise jessica nicole batten. obviously, i don't know her in person, in real life— i jut know what i see off the screen but if i had been there at all with mark cuevas during this experience as a friend, i would've honestly told him to love himself better. mark should've never bothered with jessica from the minute she'd pulled the shit she did in the pods and just seeing what the poor dude went through... man. it was truly gut-wrenching. there is just so much that's wrong with an individual like a jessica batten and honestly i can say that i have zero respect for desperate mid-30 something females who still try to behave like one, they aren't desperate (when they reek of nothing but it) and two, like they still have all this option in the world to be so darn nitpicky and choosy. i mean, i feel so hard for cuevas because he does nothing but declare his love for her meanwhile all she does is string him along with her hot/cold bullshit and i cannot stand her disgusting fakery with the whole amber/barnett situation. gag. me. with. a. spoon.

then there's amber (pike) and (mark) barnett. where to even begin? i lost all respect for barnett from the time of the pods so this dude i honestly don't care for, at all. but when it comes to marrying somebody, i can understand his reservation/s with a character like pike who lives in debt and doesn't do fuck all to dig herself out of the hole she's in. with a 700 dollar limit on a credit card (which she uses purely for make-up) and doesn't even make an effort to make minimum payment? dude. that's a problem. the fact that she openly admits that she's putting off her student loan debt and not wanting to even try to work out some sort of payment plan? the fact that she can honestly say she doesn't want to work, wants to be a stay-at-home mother and have her husband "take care of her"... damn. if i were barnett, i would have just dropped her like a hot potato at the mention of all of that.

and not because i don't want to be a stay-at-home wife and have my husband take care of me. i honest to God do. but really, i don't want to leech off my husband. i want him to be the primary breadwinner so that i can maybe do something for my own like start a little home business (or focus on my blog full-time). i just want the larger worry taken off my plate but at the same time, i cannot imagine ever going to my husband and asking for money to buy make-up or whatever random, frivolous things. and it's genuinely so triggering when i heard barnett laugh on-screen (in his confessional) and say "i honestly have no idea what she does all-day." because i've had an ex-boyfriend who use to say that all the time and it was a sign of total disrespect. as much as men claim to want a woman who will fuss and fawn over them (keep a clean house, come home to cooked meals, et cetera); they will have absolutely no respect for a significant other who has no money of their own (a.k.a. an human parasite).

the last couple— this kenny barnes and kelly chase business, i'm not even bothered, truth be told. i couldn't care less. kelly chase is so bland and another bi-polar thirty-something as far as i'm concerned that i ultimately, just feel sorry for kenny. there it goes, another "i'm not physically attracted" / "he is more like a best friend" bla bla, i'm so tired of your bullshit. cut the poor dude loose and stop yanking him around already.

lauren speed? oh, Lordy, lauren. why can't you just accept the fact that you're so lucky to have found a genuine dude and embrace it wholeheartedly???

man. i think that this show is a totally soul-crushing thing for all the people who are actually, sincerely looking to be married. firstly, i do think that the pool of contestants are all relatively young. 23, 24, 25? i don't know if marriage is something properly real yet when in that age range. definitely something that you aspire towards and/or figure would be nice to have (maybe thanks in large part to fucking "social media" and "best lives, hashtag" bullshit) but it still might feel like something "far away" i guess. you'd probably only really start thinking of the possibility of it happening in the later 20s/early 30s. realistically speaking, that is.

and then there's this whole construct of "too fast", "it's too soon", "you know each other off a tv show." SO WHAT? people meet one night at a bar. people meet each other at a random party, through a bunch of friends. heck, you might even meet at a 7-11 or a starbucks. no circumstance devalues a connection. at some point or other, you would've been two strangers in a train, in a plane, in a bus or, mostly, at a social event. party, wedding, work conference. when it comes to a "timeframe", i think is when there's a lot of stigma.

booboo always says that the strength of a relationship is measured over time. you need a proof of days, weeks, months or years. you can't just meet someone today and call them your best friend tomorrow. but i disagree. i think that the depth (and in that, strength) of any relationship is measured in how much of a connection you've built with that person. if you met someone today and you were both trapped in an elevator for over 20 hours, you possibly might've covered a lot of emotional ground talking about things i guess you normally might not really with anybody else. maybe my premise is too Hollyweird or whatever but i do genuinely believe that long-lasting relationships can be built and substantiated over experiences and conversations that're transcendent enough.

of course, even though this show is positioned as a social experiment, it's still also very much skewed to garnering ratings. i do believe these set of people were cast for a reason. very early on, you'll notice a honed in focus on a number of specific individuals. it's all for ratings, after all. so perhaps the antagonist(s) are there with good reason, perhaps everything is meant to give the viewer some jolt of a Wake Up Call.

are you a hypocrite?

are you a self-saboteur?

do you really mean it when you say that you want a Happy Ever After?

because if it's one thread of commonality i notice throughout my personal experience of dating and reiterated through watching this show is that whenever relationships become quick and easy, a lot of doubt and (by extension), self-sabotaging occurs. there becomes this great resistance and almost a reluctance to accept that the bond could be long-lasting and/or bona fide. i think as human beings, we are almost accustomed to afflictions and for some, subconsciously, addicted to drama. it's just this thought process of:
all my relationships have always been difficult and trying so if there's no tribulation, something most definitely is wrong.
quite honestly, it's heartbreaking. this universal knowledge that when it comes down to it, 99.9% of the time, it's the harder thing to accept— that you are truly worthy and deserving of goodness.