anybody who knows me can vouch that i'm a HUGE advocate of technology. i'm an early adopter, i love discovering applications, testing new methods and generally taking tech for a spin. it's no secret either that i've had a presence (for quite some years now) on the microblogging application dayre. the screenshots are all courtesy of the official website and application. and now, who's up for a deep dive?

i'd found my way on to said platform circa 2013 when my most favourite blogger (of all time) had first published a whole blog post to promote it. i'd obviously saw the need to download the application myself, create an account exclusively to subscribe to her content but beyond that, i was also excited about the prospects of mobile blogging.

late 2014, after having been initially rejected for a position years back (2011), i was finally accepted into the supposed "inner circle" and thus my tiny, almost anonymous corner on that bit of the interweb, pretty much exploded. work requirements aside, it was the year we had a super synergy going within the team and that made being on any and every application mega fun. once everyone had pretty much gone their own separate ways, the handful of us still kept active on the application as it was a means to keep in touch and stay updated. and truth be told, i was never happier and never felt freer to create and post content as i didn't have to constantly self-censor and regard how anything i publish would be received in the office. in other words, it removed all inhibitions and the creative in me rejoiced for the liberation.

then something sort of went awry with the so-called community and i experienced an uglier side of people that use (and somewhat abuse) the application as well as paid a price for my honest content. long droning story short: dayre and i have been quite the on again/off again couple.

and finally here we are at present day where, following a huge scare of dayre almost biting the bullet and being taken behind the barn to get shot; there is now new management. buyers who saved the application from a gruesome fate and a new wave of population— bourgeois millenial mothers, mostly. a handful of leftovers from The Broken Hearts Club and, well, the staff of the company that bought dayre its second chance at life.

oh, how you've come full circle, dayre.

the vibe now (if i may so lend a vocabulary word from modern-day lexicon for usage) on the application in my opinion is cliquey. (extremely) singapore-centric. loud. gender biased. brash. in your face. borderline bullying. and the so-called editor's picks are all, wouldn't you know it?, bourgeois millenial mothers. or just, bourgeois millenials. it was a whole promise of new look, new application, new vision, new direction, new bla bla bla and truth be told, the only thing that's really new is just a coat of 99 cents paint and new con artists in town. new lies. new spinning. new But Wait— There's More! and there's really not.

stupidly, i had had so much passion for the application. the creation. i'd bought into the promise. blindly, i'd created an entire pitch deck filled with early ideas and concepts. strategies. road maps. i'd attached my résumé, i'd believed i was applying for a position to spearhead the 2.0 BUT. i was lied to (your application was unreceived), my ideas obviously scavenged and now, here i lie, on my belly, in bed, writing this. smacked with a 4.48sgd bill (instead of the 3.50sgd FOR LIFE!!!) i was promised and feeling like the dumbass ex that got back together just to realise nothing has changed and maybe, the brutal reality is, that nothing ever will.

i had wanted so badly to pledge new allegiance. especially to something that to me, had been born from love. blogging has been the one thing i've found for myself from the beginning of the internet age and it is still the one thing that no matter how difficult it becomes, how tedious, how time-consuming, how energy-draining; i think about and come back to.

it's a sad day for me when i come to accept the finality that some things will never be. images in posts not loading (see above), fucked up photo quality, sending e-mails that never get answered and the inability to utilise 100% of the features offered YET being charged a foreign dollar fee to stick with you— i'm over it, dayre. i've heard the excuses. i know them well now, by heart. you need time. the things i want and ask you for are costly. your priorities at the minute does not include me. well, that's cool. do you.

i guess it doesn't even matter anymore at this point if you have me or if you don't. because the truth of the matter is that everything and everyone survives. no matter how difficult, annoying, trying— we do. or we find a way to. and i think this just may be sadder (and scarier) for me than for you but i'm done being discarded and disregarded.

so this time, i'm leaving you. and this time, it's for good.